Adulting sucks. Here are 8 Mindsets and techniques we millennials can implement in our life to make it suck a little less. This is a post I wrote way back in the day about 10 years ago. This was originally on my OG website WakenMake.com, I’ve recently started to merge it with my new one so the content my be a little different than what I usually post.
Elevate Your State Through Exploration and Celebration!
I’m Baker Manning, a born and bred southern belle turned gypsy diva. For the past 10 years, I’ve been traveling, living, and working abroad non-stop. I believe that the best way to achieve personal growth and elevate your state is through exploration and celebration, and that is what this site is all about.
This section is incomplete but oh well! Here is some adulting 101 for millennials and nomads who struggle.
Adulting Life Hacks For Millennials, Divas, & Nomads
10 years ago today my dad passed away...It was the lowest point of my life and ignited a soul-seeking / thrill-seeking journey that has now become a lifestyle for me. Over time I’ve had a lot of revelations and “mindset shifts” that have helped transform me from a sad broken little gypsy diva to my current state of mind- perma-stoked!
To show some love for my Dad I’ve decided to share some of the most powerful experiences and “elevation revelations” that have had a major positive impact on my life with y’all. For the next 10 days, I’m going to post 10 WAYS TO ELEVATE YOUR STATE 🙂 I hope you discover something useful and uplifting!
#1 GET LOST
- You have to get lost before you can find yourself ~ Paper Towns
- Explore! Leave your comfort zone, break personal boundaries
- Get lost in nature, in art, in far away places with unfamiliar faces, break away from your ego and lose yourself IN THE MOMENT
One month before my dad died I got myself into a bunch of trouble. After some not-so-legal entrepreneurial activities, I was arrested, evicted, and suspended from college. In my eyes, he died thinking I was a failure, and I was consumed by grief and guilt.
A few months after he passed away I went to a music festival called Langerado. Throughout the weekend I got lost in the music, art, and the excitement of my surroundings. I was fully present in the moment, and for the first time in a long time, I temporarily forgot about all of my troubles and woes and allowed myself to feel happy again. I became aware of the fact that it was my choice to do so, and that no matter what else was happening in my life that was out of my control, I COULD control my own emotions. From that moment on I stopped dwelling on dark thoughts from the past, and directed my energy towards making a brighter future… and I also i went to as many music festivals as possible and danced like there was no tomorrow
#2 MAXIMIZE THE SPECTACULARNESS OF LIFE
Time is one of the most valuable assets we have, so don’t waste it! We all have work and obligations that we have to do to survive, but any and every chance you get to dictate how you spend your precious time- you better make the most of it. Do what you can with what you’ve got. Whether you have 10 minutes to work with or 10 days- make it count! Discover the things that you love to do and do them as much as you can.
Everyone’s interests and circumstances are different, but every day we should each make our own unique *Recipe for Spectacularness* using as many ingredients as possible.
I have a long list of things that make me happy, and every day I try to do as many of them as possible. If we’re taking the sailboat to Nantucket for a week – you better believe I’m going to maximize that trip by bringing along my #paddleboard, #wakeboard, #rollerblades, speakers, #hoolah hoop, and as many other of my favorite things as I can fit. If I have an hour to kill I might go on a bike ride, if so I’m going to take the most scenic route and listen to my favorite songs.
#3 YOU DO YOU
The world is yours. Stop caring about what other people think or want- this is YOUR life, do what YOU want to do. If you need some time to figure out what that is- take it!
Give yourself some time to get to know the real you. Enroll in your own personal “you-niversity,” go get lost somewhere out in the you-niverse and escape the pressure and influence of your family, friends, and society. What are your biggest hopes and dreams? What is it that you want to accomplish in your life? What is the motivation behind these goals?
I come from a big traditional southern family, and I grew up in a sheltered bubble with like-minded people. My idea of being “successful” was the same as everyone else- go to college, get a well-paying job, get married, and “settle down.” I was heading down the same path until my dad passed away and everything changed.
For the first time I stopped to think about my future, and I started making decisions based on what I wanted, not anyone else. At the time I had no clue what I wanted to do- I just knew that I wanted to avoid this “adulting” thing everyone was talking about. So after college, I began my #youniversity. I decided to challenge myself by doing something completely different every year. I made a list of places I wanted to go, and things I wanted to do, learn, and experience.
Needless to say, I broke out of my southern bell shell like a bat outta’ hell and never looked back. As I transformed from a southern bell to a nomadic gypsy I learned to stop caring about what anyone thought about me or my lifestyle, there’s no shame in my game! I do what I want, when I want, and I love every minute of it.
Sometimes you have to be selfish before you can be selfless.
“Forever evolve”- strive to be in a constant state of evolution. Never stop learning, growing, and experiencing new things. TRAVEL, go somewhere you’ve never been, do something you’ve never done, or sample a new genre of music or cuisine.
Look for new ways to challenge yourself- learn a new skill, a foreign language, read books, create artwork, or play an instrument.
Look for areas of your life that you can improve- your health and fitness, your efficiency and productivity, your relationships.
Settle for better! If there’s something in your life that you’re not happy with FIX IT. But always be grateful for what you DO have- You can drive for better but still be satisfied and content with where you are in the journey
2 years after my Dad died I was living in Buenos Aires, Argentina. Although I was there to teach English I didn’t have a super busy work schedule and I had a lot of free time on my hands. Sometimes I woke up feeling useless- like I wasn’t contributing to society at all. I felt like I should be busier and more “productive.”
While all of my friends back home were working 40+ hours a week in their 9-5’s, I was frolicking around the city working 15 hours a week tops. I was feeling listless and hollow until it dawned on me that I wasn’t just frolicking around listlessly- I was learning new things every day.
I was being exposed to a whole new culture and way of life in a 3rd world Spanish-speaking country. I was learning how to adapt to life in a big city, how to navigate through the neighborhoods, how to use the subway and bus systems, and how to read and speak everything in a different language.
Although I wasn’t earning much money, I was getting richer. I was investing my time and energy into gaining new skills, perspectives, and mindsets that are priceless. I realized that at the end of the day the experiences you have, the relationships you make, and the wisdom you gain is way more valuable than money in the bank!
#5 TAKE A BREAK
It’s easy to get wrapped in the daily grind. Most of us walk around all day with an endless stream of thoughts running through our heads from the moment we wake up until we fall asleep. We go about our day constantly stressing over the future, so caught up in the daily grind that we’re completely unaware of our surroundings.
Every now and then you should stop and smell the roses! Take a break from the hustle and bustle and just *be.* Take in your surroundings, tune into your senses, and stop trying to transport your mind somewhere else. Appreciate where you are at that very moment and what all you’ve been through to get there.
“Mindfulness isn’t isn’t difficult, we just need to remember to do it.”
# 6 WAKE UP
Everyone has dreams, but if you’ve ever lucid dreamed you know how liberating it feels when you suddenly wake up inside your own dream.
In one instant all of your fear and anxiety is released, and you realize that that scary thing that’s been chasing you isn’t even real and that you aren’t a prisoner of your surroundings- you can fly!
“Don’t be pushed around by your problems, be led by your dreams.” Many people go through life in a dreamlike state, being led through a series of events, clueless about how they got there and careless to change it.
WAKE UP this isn’t a dream this is your LIFE. Just like in a dream you have the power to shape and create your own reality. If you find yourself in a situation that’s less than desirable- flap your wings and fly to higher grounds- the sky is the limit!
Never stop dreaming- dream big! But you have to WAKE UP and make it happen.
#7 DON’T BE BASIC
Be you-nique, be you-tiful, be YOU! Dress to EXPRESS, hater’s gone’ hate …TBC.
#8 INTENTION INTERVENTION
What you do doesn’t define who you are, it’s why you do it, and how you do it. Have an “intention intervention” with yourself. Ask yourself what are your biggest hopes and dreams that you want to accomplish in your life? Then ask yourself WHY? What is the motivation behind these goals?
#8 RECIPE FOR SPECTACULARNESS
It’s a beautiful world, and we all need to experience, appreciate, and celebrate it as much as we can, while we can. Never stop evolving. Figure out what brings you happiness, and surround yourself with it. Maximize the spectacularness of life every day, in every way. In order to be healthy and happy, we need to nourish our minds, body, and soul. Everyone’s interests and circumstances are different, but every day we should each wake~n~make our own unique recipe for spectacularness, using as many ingredients as possible.
Ingredients: Do what you can with what you’ve got
- First, we need to decide which ingredients to throw in the mix, the more the better!
- Then you need to shake ’em up, break ’em up, slice, dice, and spice em up when you marinate it with some good intention and alott’a love!
- Whether you take it and bake it, grill it, or chill it. The only thang that matters is that you prepare it with care, and make lots of extra so you can share!
- Enjoy your concoction Every day, but for every bit you eat, you must give away, because sharing is caring, and giving is living, and the longer you live, and the more you give, the more nutritious and delicious it is.
MILLENNIAL ADULTING 101 BONUS: # 9 LET THAT SHIT GO
(This part is incomplete.)
- Let that shit go
- Break the fake
- Past beliefs that are obsolete or bullshit
- Desire to be in control/safe
- The habit of judging events or people as good/bad
- Grudges, resentment, guilt, pain, whatever from your past that is clinging to you and holding you back
When I was 5 years old I was the shit- my world consisted of music, dancing, running around barefoot, and dressing up in costumes and bright colors. If you asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up my answer was always the same- “a queen.”
Fast forward to the age of 20- and I packed on a bunch of layers of bullshit. Self-consciousness, sorry, this is the end of the article. Love ya. mean it!